Friday, April 23, 2010

The Other Pennsylvania Baseball Team...

...is still known as the Pittsburgh Pirates, although I'm sure the Amalgamated Buccaneers Society is probably campaigning for a name change so as to seperate their actions from the alleged baseball teams in the three rivers city in their most recent 3 game debacle against the Brewers of Milwaukee.

Yesterday, 20-0.  Worst lost ever.  124 Years.   18,813 games.  Brewers' pticher Manny Parra singled through the right side off the Pirates' Dotel to produce that 20th run; it was the 3rd hit by a Brewers' pitcher that day.   36, the number of runs scroed by the Brewers in the 3 game series.   1, the number of runs scored by the Pirates.  Mets fans everywhere must be breathing sighs to know that at least for 3 games they weren't the admirers of the worst team in professional baseball.

Somali pirates have allegedly hired Ogilvy & Mather (hey!  You've got to spend that ransom money somewhere..) to explore an alternate nome de guerre than "pirate".
"Those Pittsburgh Pirates", an alleged Somali stated, " have taken the teeth, the bite, the fear from our chosen profession!"

He continued, through a kidnapped interpreter wearing a Phillies hat, "We are looking into our options.  Do we sue the Pittsburgh Baseball Club for the degradation of the "Pirates" franchise?  Do we change our name from "Somali Pirates" to "Somali Phillies"?  Do we kidnap the pitching staff...wait what am I saying?  We'd have to pay ourselves the ransom to get rid of them.  This is truly upsetting; this naming problem is not something I thought we had to deal with when I left my goat herd for the life of crime on the high seas."

Tip of the hat to dotpenn.com for the borrowed picture.

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