Wednesday, March 17, 2004

I U P U I exbealidocious !

Well, the Madness of the March Hare is upon us and there is no sign of the fast running Panthers of Indiana University-Purdue University Indianapolis in the NCAA brackets. So, whoever wins, congratulations; my interest in the process is gone. I won't be able to see an IUPUI Panther run the length of the court, stop for a latte and a massage, and score on a reverse layup (after dribbling around all five of the opposing players) before the tv announcer had a chance to pronounce the full name of the university.
I won't hear the IUPUI Panthers referred to as "the other team", "the classy opponent", or just "them", by the announcers, who are jittery about mis-pronouncing those five letters. No explanation will be forthcoming, this year, as to how two universities, Purdue University & Indiana University, are also a third university, IUPUI, and why? It'll just be basketball commentaries about effort and sacrifice and all that usual boring merde.
It's all going to be way too serious now.
It'll be that self-important clown Billy Packer crowing about another ACC team (go pick one) that is head-and-shoulders above the detritus of all of the other teams.
It'll be Mr. Knight doing his version of "Flight of the Valkyrrie" as he browbeats his Texas Techies to another emotional meltdown.
And when was the last time any team from Alaska was invited? Come on, just for dealing with the hair-raising flights they take must qualify them for an automatic entry each year! ..and isn't there that school up there, University of Alaska-Komandorskiye Islands College at Ketchikan, U A K I C K, that was assured of its first appearance this year? Who would have predicted that glacier ice floe washing out the runway, thus causing them to miss their conference championship game?

I'll just wait for next year. Go I U P U I.

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